| Our actions and the words we use are evaluated and
accepted or rejected by others around us. The degree to which others
accept or reject our behaviors is the determinant of our interpersonal
communication skills. The better our interpersonal
communication skills are the more
likely we are going to be respected --- and trusted.
We can't expect that everyone will understand us.
After all, we have different needs and different values that drive our
behaviors. So does everyone else. We must, however, be aware of how we come
across to others and to make every effort to respect their interests just as
we expect them to respect our own. This often called self-awareness.
Becoming self-aware is the first step to improving
our interpersonal effectiveness. Most of our behaviors are natural
for us. We aren't aware of the impact these behaviors have on others. That
leaves us with "blind spots" that others don't want to
mention to us because they don't want to hurt our feelings, they are afraid
of a reaction from us, or they just don't care. Through self-awareness we
learn what impact our behaviors - both positive and negative - have on
others. That knowledge helps us become more effective in our
interactions with others.
Once we become self-aware we can examine and change
behaviors that need changing. The option is our own. So are the
consequences. When we choose to seek ways to modify our undesirable
behaviors we begin the process of self-regulation. This is a
conscious process through which we may ask for input from our family,
trusted coworkers or friends, or a professional therapist.
Awareness of interpersonal skills also helps us understand why others
behave the way they do. This skill is called empathy.
It does not require that we agree with others; rather, empathy
challenges us to understand and accept the
notion that others have the right to be different. Empathy helps us
become better listeners and more efficient at reading and interpreting
non-verbal cues in others. Empathy makes us better learners.
So the concept of interpersonal skills isn't
simple. Our behaviors are complex. How our behaviors are
perceived are even more complex because the people in our environment have
varying needs and values, as we ourselves do. Our interpersonal skills
can help us attract a life partner or cause a separation. They can
help us obtain employment or they can cause our employment to be
terminated. It is incumbent on us to learn about ourselves as others
see us, not as we ourselves in our mirror. Life could be, for many,
much better.
At CorporatePerspectives, Inc., we are committed to
helping people learn more about themselves and their interactions with
others. That's why we are pleased to offer you the opportunity to receive
your own FREE personalized behavior style assessment - about 25 pages of
detailed information all about yourself. Click here
to complete our registration form and click the box next to "I would like to receive
a complimentary WORK behavior style report" or, if you are in sales
or sales management, click on the box next to "I would like to receive
a complimentary SALES behavior style report." All we ask is that (1)
you provide complete and accurate information on the registration form, and
(2) you understand that you are granting us permission to contact you by
telephone during normal business hours to provide you with the confidential
online login and password information to complete your
assessment.
Please understand that we will not leave login and
password information on telephone voice mail or recorded message
devices. We apologize that we cannot offer our FREE reports in
countries other than the United States (including U.S. possessions) and
Canada.
See more about Soft Skill Competency Benchmarks
Videos for Interpersonal
Skills Training at HRVideo.com
The article above was authored by P.L."Rick"
Hogan, M.S., founder and president of CorporatePerspectives, Inc. Rick
and his colleagues specialize in organizational behavior and interpersonal
communication skills development in the workplace. Please see The
Path of Dialogue and the Managing
for Success™ behavior style analysis (a self-awareness assessment)
for further information.
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